EDITORIAL: A Plea To Dixie and Jeff, S**t or Get Off The Pot

WARNING:  Some language contained here may not be PG.  Sorry, Vince.

When I posted my “Vince McMahon Joins Twitter” article the other day, it was all in good fun.  Imagining what the 64-year old WWE chairman might say online is quite an entertaining exercise, but that’s really all it was intended for — entertainment.  But funny enough… TNA has a president who actually is active on Twitter and has quite a lot to say.  Even the founder of TNA, Jeff “Vince won’t take me back so, daddy, please help me open a new company” Jarrett has been unable to resist the urge to tweet to his many followers.

For this, I give them credit.  But that’s about where it ends.  Dixie Carter upset many fans when she teased some surprises on her page several weeks ago and, well, Tommy Dreamer debuted.  Perhaps realizing she had whipped her followers into quite a frenzy, she was forced to tone things down a bit later on and tell people that this big surprise was not a change in creative or a new debut, but rather, a series of changes that would become apparent over the course of several weeks.  While “Impact” has certainly been a better show the past two weeks (I’m grading on a curve here), I’d hardly say any significant changes are apparent with the product.   It’s no secret that the company is moving forward with plans for some sort of “extreme invasion” and they want Paul Heyman to not only run the creative end of things, but to be the on-air leader for this new faction.  Yes, ECW circa 2010.  Heyman has now publicly shat on that idea and has laid out very explicitly what it would take to get him to join TNA.  Will the Carters agree to his demands?  Time will tell.

Meanwhile, give her credit, the lady is persistent if nothing else.  Dixie continues to tease something big on her Twitter page, posting the following less than 24 hours ago:

“Oh, if you guys only knew who I met with today….. You will.”

She could meet with Steve Austin, riding a shark through the high seas, all the way to Hollywood to have brunch with Dwayne Johnson, where all three of them proceed to drive cross-country (all the while singing wrestler theme songs) to sit bedside and keep vigil for the vegetative Undertaker… and I STILL wouldn’t care because who could possibly believe what this woman has to say anymore.  So much hype with such little return does nothing to inspire confidence amongst your fanbase.  The endless promises of “revolutionary” changes have brought with it the same writing staff.  The same 1.0 rating.  The same 20,000 PPV buys.  Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, well…

Which brings me to ‘ol Double J.  Seems as though he’s gotten in on the fun, too.  He’s been teasing “big news” on his Twitter page as well this week:

“Just received some huge news!”

“Huge news is happening today and tomorrow…”

Later on, he posted several photos as “hints” as to what the news might be.  The first photo appears to be a shot of an island, the second photo shows a giant spotlight, and a third photo shows an airplane wing.  Really.  From this, I can only deduce one thing: TNA will be flying it’s creative team to a remote island for a real-life version of The Condemned to air on Spike.  We can always hope.

In all seriousness, enough with the teases.  I’m guessing Dixie’s news and the news Jeff is talking about are two entirely different things, but the point is the same.  Your company is losing money.  In fact, people are concerned TNA may not exist 12 months from now.  It may not sound like it, but I’d like to see them succeed.  I’d like to see Heyman, or ANYONE with a vision really, step in and be a real game-changer.  The only thing Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff have changed, thus far, is their underwear.  At least I hope they have.  Quit fucking around and just DO SOMETHING instead of talking about it.

Shit or get off the pot.  Other people need to use it, too, you know.

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P.S. Follow me on Twitter, I may have HUGE NEWS in the next few days!!!  Or I may not.