WWE RAW opens with Justin Roberts introducing the WWE Champion Randy Orton. Michael Cole, JBL and Jerry Lawler talk about the controversial finish to Survivor Series as well as Michael Strahan guest-hosting tonight’s RAW. The Wyatt Family vs. CM Punk and Daniel Bryan is announced as a handicap match for later tonight.
Orton starts by saying he’s owed an apology from everyone for thinking he wouldn’t show up here tonight as the WWE Champion. Orton says The Authority agreed to join him out at ringside tonight. With that said, out comes Triple H and Stephanie McMahon.
Triple H starts off by congratulating Orton on his victory at Survivor Series. He says they couldn’t be any more pleased with his win over Big Show. HHH says when Orton first came into the company he knew he had the potential to be one of the greatest Superstars in the history of WWE. Stephanie says they gave him exactly what he needed last week – motivation. She says it’s always nice when she and Triple H are always right. Orton says he’s not shocked to hear Stephanie make this all about her. Orton says he didn’t need their help and they interfered right when he was about to win without help. HHH says they promised there wouldn’t be any physical interference. He says Orton may have trouble remembering because he was unconscious at the time and the reason they came out was because they thought there was about to be a new WWE Champion. Orton says he took everything Big Show had to offer, unlike someone he knows (referring to Triple H). Orton says he is the greatest Superstar in the 50 years this company has been around. He says no one can take that away from him. With that said, John Cena’s music hits.
The World Heavyweight Champion John Cena makes his way to the ring. Cena says, “how you doing, I’m John Cena — World Heavyweight Champion.” He almost calls Orton a giant piece of…but Stephanie cuts him off before he can say sh*t. Cena addresses the “Daniel Bryan” and “Yes” chants by saying the fans are sick of the administrative b.s. Cena says he asked one question that he found interesting — who is the champion. He says he sees two champions in the ring right now. He says they should cut through the administrative b.s. and make just one champion. Cena officially challenges Orton to unify the titles. Stephanie says they’ve actually been talking about this for a while now. Orton says he knew that’s what they were talking to Cena about at Survivor Series. Triple H tells Orton to grow up. He says a minute ago he was bragging about how good he is and now he’s crying about it. HHH says they’re going to do something epic. In three weeks at the WWE TLC pay-per-view, they are going to hang the WWE and World Heavyweight Championships above the ring and they’re going to make history. HHH says it will be Randy Orton going one-on-one against John Cena in a tables, ladders and chairs match. Both guys hold their titles up as HHH’s music hits. The Authority leave the ring while Cena and Orton stare each other down a little bit longer.
As we head to commercial, Michael Cole announces a six-man tag-team match that will take place after the break. It will be Rey Mysterio, Goldust and Cody Rhodes against all three members of The Shield.
Rey Mysterio, Goldust & Cody Rhodes vs. The Shield
As we return from commercial The Shield are already making their entrance into the ring. Michael Cole talks about tieing the record at Survivor Series for the most eliminations by an individual in a traditional Survivor Series elimination match. He’s only the second person in hsitory to eliminate four people in one match in the history of the pay-per-view. Goldust’s music hits and out he comes with his brother Cody Rhodes. As they enter the ring, Rey Mysterio’s music hits and out comes Mr. 6-1-9.
The bell rings and all three members of The Shield attack the babyfaces. When the smoke clears, Seth Rollins is beating up Goldust as the two legal men in the ring. Rollins quickly tags Dean Ambrose in and Ambrose continues the beatdown. Ambrose tags Rollins back in just seconds later. Rollins stomps Goldust a few times and tags Ambrose right back in. Ambrose chokes Goldust with the middle rope. Goldust catches Ambrose’s legs and launches Ambrose over the top. Goldust hits hit drop-down uppercut on Ambrose. Ambrose tags in Rollins and within seconds Goldust launches Rollins over the top as well. Rollins tags in Roman Reigns and Reigns blasts Goldust with a clothesline to prevent him from making the tag. We head to a mid-match commercial on that note.
When we return from commercial, Goldust is fighting back at Ambrose but Ambrose cuts him off and tags in Reigns. Goldust hits a double-DDT on both guys and starts crawling to his corner. Rollins is tagged back in and he tries to stop Goldust from making the tag. Goldust makes the tag to Mysterio anyways, who Cole points out is competing in his first match on RAW since February. Mysterio is beating up all three members of The Shield. Mysterio sets Rollins up for the 6-1-9 but Rollins avoids it and smashes into Mysterio. Both guys are down. Both guys make the tag. Rhodes and Ambrose are now the legal men in the match. Rhodes hits an Alabama slam on Rollins for a near fall. Rhodes tags back in Mysterio. Mysterio immediately sets Rollins back up for the 6-1-9. As he goes to hit Rollins with it, Reigns comes out of nowhere and spears Mysterio. Reigns sidewalk slams Goldust but Rhodes knocks Reigns out of the ring. Rhodes goes for his finisher on Rollins, but Ambrose, who was apparently the legal man, catches Rhodes from behind with the face-plant. 1-2-3. The Shield wins.
Winners: The Shield
Michael Cole runs down Michael Strahan’s credentials and accomplishments as we head to commercial. Our guest host, Michael Strahan is coming up on RAW after the break.
Before we head to commercial, Jerry Lawler reveals that the fans get to vote on the stipulation in a match on RAW tonight between Dolph Ziggler and Damien Sandow. The options are: a “Strong Island Street Fight” (not a typo), a “Long Island Lumberjack Match” and a “Hamptons Hardcore Match.” We head to commercial.
MizTV with Michael Strahan and Titus O’Neil
When we return from commercial, The Miz is standing in the ring for a MizTV segment. The Miz welcomes his guest tonight, the guest-host for WWE RAW this week — Michael Strahan. Instead of Strahan, out comes Titus O’Neil with a painted gap between his teeth to mock Strahan. Miz tells “Michael” that he’s never looked so good. O’Neil talks with a lisp to mock Strahan even further. O’Neil says it’s an honor to stand next to a former WrestleMania main eventer. Miz asks O’Neil “what’s with the gap?” talking about his teeth. He says he should pawn his Super Bowl ring and get his teeth fix. O’Neil says the gap is distinctive. Miz says the gap is bigger than the gap between the New York Giants and the playoffs. The crowd boo’s Miz and Miz says “ooh The Miz is a bad guy…it was just a joke everybody!” O’Neil wants to welcome Titus O’Neil.
Michael Strahan comes out smiling and pointing to the gap between his teeth. Strahan comes to the ring. He and O’Neil playfully bump chests. I guess O’Neil was doing that as a tribute to him? Strahan says he has to say than you to Titus and The Miz. Strahan says their jokes were weak. He says the towel boy makes better jokes. He says O’Neil’s “suit game” is strong but his “gap game” is weak. Strahan says the WWE is all about fun and asks the fans if they’re ready to have some fun tonight. Strahan thanks everyone for letting him be the honorary guest host. He says tonight we’re going to have a double tag-team main event. In one corner we’re going to have the WWE Champion Randy Orton and his partner Alberto Del Rio. Strahan says in the other corner will be Big Show and the World Heavyweight Champion John Cena. He’s holding his words to emphasize them “John Cenaaaaaaaaa” etc. Painful to listen to.
The Miz puts over himself as a wrestler. He asks Michael Strahan if he can “hack it” in the ring. Strahan says Kelly Ripa is tougher than him. Miz says he’s the most must-see Superstar in WWE history, he’s not sipping coffee next to Kelly Ripa every morning. The two keep arguing and Titus O’Neil cuts them off. O’Neil says he understands Strahan is a good athlete but this is not football. He says if Miz hits him with even a simple move than Strahan might not make it to work with Kelly Ripa tomorrow. Miz asks if Strahan thinks he can handle a simple hip-toss. Strahan says let’s try a simple hip-toss then. O’Neil clears away some of the MizTV set. Strahan and Miz keep talking over each other. This is brutal. O’Neil says he’s available if Strahan is can’t make it to work tomorrow.
O’Neil goes to hip-toss Strahan but Strahan blocks it. Miz mocks O’Neil a bit so he takes his sport coat off and he’s serious about it now. Miz asks the fans if they think he can do it. O’Neil tries again but Strahan blocks it once more. Miz says he’s afraid to take a hip-toss he understands. Now Miz is going to do something and O’Neil is standing back. Miz goes to hip-toss Strahan but Strahan reverses it and hip-tosses Miz. Miz is on the ground smiling. All the guys are talking over each other again. Jeez. O’Neil grabs Strahan and does the “millions of dollas” dance until Strahan, out of nowhere, hip-tosses O’Neil too. O’Neil gets up and smiles. All three guys do the “millions of dollars” dance. Michael Cole is shouting to the ring inviting Strahan to come do commentary all night with them. Strahan doesn’t hear it. I believe the segment is over, and thank god for that. I forgot how atrocious these celebrity guest host segments can be. We head to commercial after they plug the fans ability to vote for the Ziggler-Sandow match tonight.